Being the Little Sister

I don't know about you but being a sibling can be hard on a person at times...growing up it was just me and my older sister...we are only two years apart but from the start we were and are still best friends...I love my sister dearly and have looked up to her for as long as I can remember...but being younger and looking up to her has taken it's tole on me and my development as a woman...see, my whole life I have compared my success to her...she excelled in school---talking about declared "gifted" in junior high and 4.0 g.p.a thru high school and went to an Ivy League College...me on the otherhand...my grades were good---mostly B's and few A's, just your average good kid...this is where my problems began...because I felt I couldn't make my parents proud with my grades I decided I would excell in sports and try to shine in a different way...that worked out great but my shine still did not get me the full ride in college that I thought would have really made my parents proud...now before you start thinking that my parents influenced my thoughts or feelings in anyway, let me set the record straight...they NEVER compared us at all...they loved us equally and were equally proud of us...but yet, these thoughts of comparison stayed in my mind thru out my life...I just felt everyone was doing it...so here I am now 28yrs old and still comparing my success to my sister's...will this ever END?

This particular Blog was sparked by the fact that my sister recently turned 3o and bought her 1st home...yep, all by herself w/out help from anyone she did it and I am SOOOO proud of her...but then little sister mind kicks in and I start looking at my life and saying..."There is NO way I am going to be ready to buy a house in two years"...it's crazy because I really do think and try to plan out buying a house in the near future...now I know you're probably thinking it's all in my head and no one is comparing us at all so I should just "GET OVER IT" and be happy where I am in life...but before you give me the "love your-self" or "everyone's path is different" speech just hear me out...it's the comments that I get hit with constantly that make me think, well maybe I should be buying a house soon...for example: Just the other day we were at SEARS because big sis was buying appliances for her house, the sales guy at first was talking to my mom until my mother pointed out that it was actually my sister who was buying the appliances for her home...so to make a long story short she orders the stuff and right before we leave the freaking sales guy turns to me and goes "so, where's your house?" now I wanted to just shout "REALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!" but instead I laughed it off and said "well I'm the little sister so I still have some time"...but really, who did he think he was...why ask that question...am I reading too much into it...man, what can I say...just some random "thoughts from my head"!